Have you ever seen a herd of cattle laying in a field on a sunny day? It’s pretty common here in Texas. The bull gazes up at the sun, closes his eyes, and connects with the earth. Taurus, the bull, is an earth sign, and it embodies self-care in its purest form. But beyond the physical, Taurus also represents something deeper—enlightenment. There is nothing more important than the bliss of life, Taurus tells us, encouraging us to slow down and experience that inner peace.
For years, I let my own needs go. I can’t speak for you, but for me, it happened slowly. Gradually, the demands of school, work, therapy appointments, and researching my son’s diagnosis took little bits of time from my day, until eventually, I was left with none for myself. I became a shell of who I once was, but it all came from a place of love and a desire to understand my son’s needs better. I thought if I just gave a little more, I’d have it all figured out. But what I didn’t realize was how much of myself I was giving away.
If I’m really honest, keeping busy with his needs was also a sweet distraction from facing my own. I hadn’t yet addressed or processed my own traumas before becoming a mother, and the chaos of caregiving felt like an easier way to avoid my own pain. It took me time to see that running from my traumas while focusing on my son wasn’t helping either of us.
Caregiving isn’t just about giving to others. It’s about making room to care for yourself, too. This doesn’t make you selfish in an egotistical way. Self-absorption can, but self-care is what sustains us, keeping us present and available for those who rely on us. And for those who aren’t caregivers to a disabled person, it’s hard to imagine the constant worry about our child’s present, never mind their future. That heavy weight never lightens, no matter how much time passes.
I used to push through the stress, that my needs didn't matter. It’s what I was taught growing up. This is one part of my generational and cultural trauma that needed tending to and still does. Mindfulness is how I tended to it—what worked for me was acknowledging that pushing through wasn’t serving me anymore.
Have you ever noticed how caregiving feels heavier some days? It’s not just the physical demands—it’s the emotional load that can weigh us down. The constant pressure to be the steady hand not just for our disabled loved one, but for siblings, a spouse, a partner, or even the entire household, can sometimes feel unbearable. I used to push through the stress, thinking it was normal. But in reality, it was taking more from me than I realized.
Dr. Gabor Mate, says that unaddressed emotional stress can manifest physically in our bodies—whether through exhaustion, pain, or burnout. And the guilt? That guilt about taking even a few minutes for myself only added to the weight. I thought if I just worked harder, I wouldn’t feel so guilty. But the truth is, when we give ourselves permission to rest and recharge, we’re able to show up even better for our loved ones. Self-care doesn’t take away from caregiving; it strengthens it.
What if caregiving could become a Libra balancing act practice of both giving and receiving? Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about how shifting our energy can change everything. By giving ourselves time to focus on our own wellness, we can actually transform the way we approach caregiving.
It doesn’t take grand gestures to start feeling more whole again. Small, mindful acts—like taking a breath before beginning your day or journaling before bed—can create space for self-compassion. My other inspiration, Thich Nhat Hanh, said in an interview that the first thing he does when he wakes up is smile. I’ve adopted this small act, along with taking a gentle deep breath as I smile, and I remind myself that I have another day. As someone who went through breast cancer treatment, this small mindful practice brings a sense of peace and gratitude every morning.
Mindfulness is more than just a practice—it’s a tool for survival as a caregiver. This tool helps me see caregiving as a path for soul growth, rather than a random act that was thrust upon me. With this mindset, I want to make my son’s life, and the lives of anyone else reliant on the kindness and compassion of humanity, more than just about survival—I want them to feel alive and connected to the world.
Mindfulness is about being fully present in your day, feeling grounded in the moment, even when life feels chaotic. For me, mindfulness started with small things, like noticing how warm my tea felt in my hands or paying attention to the sound and feel of my breath. It didn’t change the demands I faced, but it gave me a way to pause, reset, and come back to caregiving with a clearer mind.
Caregiving isn’t just about giving; it’s about delicate balance—something we can learn from the signs of Taurus and Libra. Taurus, the earth sign with its love of beauty and bliss, reminds us to slow down and that to prioritize our own well-being is natural. Esoterically, Taurus is also the sign of enlightenment, showing us that the more we care for our inner self, the more we are connected to a deeper truth. Libra, on the other hand, teaches us that when we care for ourselves as much as we care for others, it helps neutralize and dissolve the guilt and emotional strain that come from fatigue, allowing us to feel more centered and at peace, for a little while. Then lather, rinse, and repeat.
It took time for me to learn this, but caring for yourself is never selfish. It’s necessary. Balancing caregiving with self-compassion isn’t about doing it all perfectly—it’s about recognizing that our wellness is intertwined with the well-being of those we care for. By nurturing our souls, we can give from a place of abundance, not depletion. And when we fill ourselves with love and energy, our loved ones feel it too. They won't feel like they are a burden on us; instead, they feel the love and our desire to make their life as beautiful as possible. When I hold my son's hand and tell him thank you for being, he knows I mean it.
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